Being a mediator for over 12 years, I often ask myself a question: what is the “good” of a good divorce and why is good ending valuable even when couples don’t have children and presumably will never see each other again following their divorce? What can mediation give to couples besides the obvious benefits of being much less expensive and time consuming? I believe that good ending can bring forth a good beginning. Couples in mediation, while negotiating over their divorce agreements and trying to find reasonable compromises, often reflect on what went wrong and why. This causes them to contemplate on how they can change their situation in the future for the better. If they can sort out some of their issues while they are in mediation, they are less likely to repeat the same mistakes again. To me this is a huge benefit
One of my clients once said to me on their last mediation session: I feel like we could have stayed married if we’d communicated with each other as we do now in mediation. I thought to myself that they could have stayed married should they have learned to communicate earlier and thus become a people they are transforming into now by getting a divorce.